I felt the fear and did it anyway.
- The nervousness before, holy shit, it was extreme! Once on the starting line, however, I was most excited and eager to get going.
- I started the race by cycling with a group from Power Woman but I ended up a little wrong, behind some other girls, so I saw that my group started before me and I was slowed down by those in front of me. I tried to catch up but then my heart rate became too high and I didn't feel like pushing too hard at the beginning so I let them go and decided to run my own race.
- There was a tailwind and I had a good flow with alert and strong legs. I passed a lot of people and I enjoyed cycling on the roads without stops and disturbing moments. I didn't look at the distance on my watch so when I suddenly saw the depot sign I was shocked. WHAT? I had already cycled a little over 30km?
- Full of energy, I stopped and went to the toilet, drank some coffee and ate a banana. I took a gel every half hour plus sports drink and never felt low on energy. (Maurtens was a good choice, my stomach has never been so good! I've had stomach problems before with too many gels and sports drinks).
- Off again and straight to the famous hill at Omberg. I was pretty scared of this one. I've had quite a few incidents on hills where I've shifted wrong and the chain has jumped off and I've fallen. Not great for self-confidence directly. I immediately felt that, nope, I will not fight too hard in this one so I went up half.
- After I got up the hill, it then went quickly downhill and suddenly I hear something fall from the bike. A screw had gone off and I became quite nervous as it went so fast downhill. It turned out that the bike shoes were completely loose and the screws had come loose. Now I also started to get tired mentally and just wanted to get to the depot. Once there, Andreas, my husband, had made his way there and helped me with the shoes. I drank blueberry soup and took a bun. More coffee and chatted with people. There was a lot of time in this depot because of the trouble with the shoes.
- The road to the next and last depot to 79 km was hard with a terrible headwind and now my lower back and down to the back of the thigh began to hurt. I tried to move and tilt my back as I cycled to relieve the pressure on my back. I cycled on with light legs anyway but wondered if the depot will NEVER show up. I thought to myself that "if my back did not hurt, I would have had it as "easy" as possible". It felt like a whole eternity and in the end I could not cycle more so stopped and tried to stretch and move.
- Once at the last depot, I visited the toilet AGAIN, I was crazy needing to pee. (how much can a person pee really?😂) And then I will not go into how many times I was in the toilet BEFORE the race. haha!)
- The headwind that now came from the side continued and I was so SICK of it howling in my ears and leading a damn life. I wanted peace and quiet! The legs cycled on easy and with high cadence to save energy. The pain in my back released a little and I got lots of energy when I realized that it was not so far away. The wind died down and it became a tailwind and I smiled to myself. I had cycled stably in zones 2 and 3 all the way and now I thought it was time to shit in the zones and just drive!
- When I saw the Motala sign, I got a laughing attack while crying a little. Imagine that what I was so nervous about before, became a completely different story. I who so easily get catastrophic thoughts felt NONE of it. I trusted my body!
I cycled all I could into the finish and I roared with joy!
- I am so incredibly proud of how I tackled my first long bike race and I got confirmation that my training has paid off. I was energized afterwards and not exhausted. I had a desire to get around in under 4 hours, it did not happen but the final time was 4.45 but considering that I stayed quite long in depots with trouble, the goal was not so far away. I am crazy happy about my journey which is not only about a physical performance but so much more.
I felt the fear and did it anyway.
- The next day I woke up with the craving again. I WANT MORE! Exactly what remains to be seen, maybe run next year with my own group? There are so many possibilities and nothing stops me from reaching my dreams.